What Every Coach Dreads: Being Speechless
I do a quick time-check of how long we’ve been in session, and we’re at the point where the energy is meant to build back up.
“I need to survive. I had no-one to trust, I had to fight my way to survive. That’s all I know”
I could see her energy through the grainy Zoom screen get smaller and smaller.
As a coach, I’m meant to leave people feeling empowered, to facilitate healing. Yet, in that moment I felt her. I felt that fear. I felt that scarcity, I had no advice for how to see this situation in a “growth-mindset, big-picture, unity oneness” perspective.
I was feeling even slower than usual, not on my toes, I had no inspiration coming through. I was just drawing blanks.
A small voice says in the back of my mind, “You deserve this, waking up 15 minutes before the session begins, that’s not very professional, you’re still half-asleep”.
I shrug off that thought and decide to buy myself some time: “I want to reconnect you back to your body, close your eyes and take some deep breaths”
We pause for a few moments. I’m giving myself time, I take a breath, expecting inspired ideas or profound statements to flood my consciousness. Nothing comes and it seems like lifetimes.
We’re closing our eyes and breathing together.
And deep down, I feel something is transforming within me, too. I’m also in uncharted territory: the person who always had something profound, intelligent or funny to say, speechless.
And I feel within both of us, a space growing. Away from the mind.
And this stillness, is magnificent.
I surrendered to grace, I accepted my limited nature and said a short prayer to open this session to the highest growth, service, good and healing.
The little voice inside my head changed from snide comments to support: “The healing rarely comes from your mind anyway, it is just your non-judgmental presence. Sometimes being sleepy and relaxed is the best way to access this. Let go of expectations and let it be…”
We breathed and tapped using EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), using just her words of her own experience that I had been writing down the whole session.
I was forced to be completely focused on her, rather than be inside my own mind.
As the session came to a close, the client was quietly beaming.
“I feel so still” she says.
As I always do, I then guided us into a closing meditation to ground in that stillness, to anchor the stillness of divine presence, of the presence of our higher self, the knowing that we have access to creative solutions and we can get through anything.
As the Zoom call closed, with smiles and blessings, I click the big red button that ends this distance session.
And closing my eyes, I had no words, but just a stillness inside of me. “Thank you, God”.